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The best Family Guy Quotes ever TOPIC

This is a discussion on The best Family Guy Quotes ever TOPIC within the Off Topic forums, part of the Entertainment category; Im watching familyguy season 1 ep 1 till season 5 ( still downloading more episodes ) ANyways, post your favorite ...
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  1. #1
    Senior Member Chemical's Avatar
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    Im watching familyguy season 1 ep 1 till season 5 ( still downloading more episodes )

    ANyways, post your favorite quotes

  2. #2
    Senior Member koffs's Avatar
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    ''Stewie : try to think a happy place , ok ok I'm on MTV's jackass.
    - Stew-o
    - Hello I'm Stewie Griffin and I'm gonna kick my dad's ass all day today.

    *Stewie slaps peter*
    *Stewie rips of his shirt*

    Peter: c'mon Stewie c'monnnnn your acting crazy out there.''

  3. #3
    apoth0r
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    "this is worse then the time i forgot how to sit down"
    *plants face first into the chair"

  4. #4
    Ainelover
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    " Jesus u crazy man , U CRAZY!!!! "
    " That's Whats my ex wife said "

    "Jesus you sure are son of a .... wooooooaaaaahh "

    ^^

    so many good haha, dunno what more

    EDIT : here is some clips they cut, so many funny things in it, 2 favorites

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdvqbKo9zjM...ted&search=
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=404yxEpbuKs...ted&search=

  5. #5
    Pwner4Last
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    Lois:
    -You turn peter. What color does firetrucks have ?

    Peter:
    -oh this is a hard one uhm uhm let me think hmm hmm what color does do red firetrucks have hmm red firetrucks what color are those red firetrucks.

    After 2min:
    Peter:
    -Are they red ?


    ROFL

  6. #6
    Senior Member koffs's Avatar
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    Family Guy is just to funny :P

    ''Meg : I'm so fat and grose.

    Brian : awww

    Meg : I just should kill myself

    Brian : awwww c'mon

    Meg : I'm gonna do it I'm gonna kill myself if no1 goes with me

    Brian : awwww meg c'moooon awwwww''

  7. #7
    Senior Member Eric's Avatar
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    Brian : Peter what are you doing?
    Peter : Crack.
    Brian : What the fuck?
    Peter : Hey at least I'm not drinking Brian.
    Brian : This isn't a great substitute. Where'd you get crack?
    Peter : From Blacks.
    Brian : What?
    Peter : Yea, right behind Blacks Hardware Store, theres a white guy selling it.
    Brian : Look doing crack isnt the way to stop drinking, you need to find out why you started drinking in the first place. This is a number of a hypnotherapist I want you to see.
    Peter : Alright Brian.
    Peter : *lights bong*

    Next Scene
    Brian : Hey peter, thought I'd check in on you.
    Brian : Oh my god!
    Peter : Gov'mnt came 'an took mah baby!

  8. #8
    Ruthless
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    i got a few:
    *Peter filming stewie on his tricycle until he gets distracted by a piece of trash*
    Peter: LOOK! Its dancing with me! its like theres this benevolent force which is telling me that i dont need to be afraid..
    *in the clouds God is watching over*
    God: "ITS JUST A PIECE OF TRASH FLYING IN THE WIND!!, DO U HAV AN IDEA HOW COMPLICATED UR CIRCULATORY SYSTEM IS?!"


    Peter: i've had a spiritual vision once..*daydreams*
    Peter: "Hey brian, theres a message in my alphabits, it says OOOOOOOO"
    Brian: "Peter those r cheerios..."

    Brian: "Its good to finally hang around with a group of intelligent people, usually i just hang around with an idiot"
    *next scene*
    Peter: "Hey Brian!, i made a waterslide in the house!"
    *Falls down the stairs and hurts himself*
    Brian :"I'm not gonna call the hospital cos u kno u wont learn anything" *continues to read newspaper*


    Peter: "Look lois, our marriage cannot be measured in nipples and dimes..i mean nickles and boobs........money"


    Thats only a fraction of all my faves lol

  9. #9
    infolock
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    A few quotes, but mainly the scene.

    Stewie Griffin: Besides, I know how to deal with children, unlike Mr. Geppetto.
    [cutaway to Geppetto's workshop]
    Geppetto: [drops his glasses intentionally] Oh no, I dropped my glasses. [bends down with his behind facing Pinocchio] Uh, by the way, uh, Pinocchio, uh, there was a cookie missing from the jar. Did you, uh, did you take it by any chance?
    Pinocchio: Yes, Papa Gepetto, I'm sorry.
    Geppetto: Are you sure you took it? Because, uh, I'd believe you if you said you didn't.
    Pinocchio: No, I took it, Papa. I wouldn't lie to you.
    Geppetto: You could try. Who knows? You might get away with it.


    PS: Deus, Elune, and Chemical lick serious nerd balls.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Chemical's Avatar
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    LOL, i saw some movies on youtube with the quotes people posted.


    Oh, Bill, It wasn't me. ktnx.

    Elune = Cecilia
    Deus = Private

  11. #11
    infolock
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    Oh, Bill, It wasn't me. ktnx.[/b]
    It's all good in the young white hood. Have a nice day.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Chemical's Avatar
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    K, After i saw like 900 episodes in the last 3 days, here's my list

    Peter (when he's hungover): This sucks worse than that time I went to that museum. (Flashback to childhood, standing in museum looking at dinosaur
    skeltons.)
    Peter (as a child): Why did all the dinosaurs die out?
    Man at Museum: Because you touch yourself at night.

    Meg: I just want to kill myself I'm gonna go upstairs and eat a whole bowl of peanuts.
    (Lois and Peter stare in silence)
    Meg: I'm allergic to peanuts.
    (Peter and Lois keep staring)
    Meg: You dont know anything about me. (runs upstairs)
    Peter: Who was that guy?


    Peter (after Lois tells him he's childish): "If I'm a child that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if i'm going stand here and take this from a pervert."

    Peter: (Grabs the microphone at a fast food restaurant) Attention restaurant customers: Testicles. That is all.

    Peter - I'm afraid I have some very bad news, your wife's gonna be a vegetable. You're gonna have to bathe her, feed her, and care for her for the rest of your life.
    Guy - OH MY GOD!
    Peter - No no no, I'm just kiddin. She's dead.

    Lois: Peter,why are we stopped?
    Peter: Yeah, I'll have three cheeseburgers...
    Lois: Peter for God's sakes she's havin' a baby!
    Peter: Oh that's right...and a kid's meal... and uh,I, I guess I'll have fries...if I have fries is anyone else gonna have any? Cuz,uh I don't wanna be the only one eatin' them... I'll feel like a fatty.

    (Peter has to come up with a fake name on the spot, so he looks around the room to get inspiration)
    Peter Griffin: Uh... my name is...(he sees a pea)
    Peter Griffin: Pea...
    (he sees a woman crying)
    Peter Griffin: ... tear...
    (he sees a Griffin fly by)
    Peter Griffin: ... Griffin. Peter Griffin


    Lois: Honey, what do you say we uh...christen these new sheets, huh?
    Peter: Why Lois Griffin, you naughty girl.
    Lois: Hehehe...that's me.
    Peter: You dirty hustler.
    Lois: Hehehehe...
    Peter: You filthy, stinky prostitute.
    Lois: Aha, ok I get it...
    Peter: You foul, venereal disease carrying, street walking whore.
    Lois: Alright, that's enough!

    Peter: I know something about stupid phone calls
    (phone rings in house)
    Lois: Hello?
    Peter: I cant take the trash out today im working late at the office.
    Peter: The called ID says your calling from the kitchen. In fact I can see you.
    Peter: Can you see me now?
    Lois: No.
    Peter: Now I am at the office.

    Lois: You're drunk again.
    Peter: No, I'm just exhausted 'cause I've been up all night drinking.

  13. #13
    Rampage
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    Prison guy with knife: You guys are all dead.
    Peter : Excellent, he thinks that we're zombies.

  14. #14
    infolock
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    Lois: Honey, what do you say we uh...christen these new sheets, huh?
    Peter: Why Lois Griffin, you naughty girl.
    Lois: Hehehe...that's me.
    Peter: You dirty hustler.
    Lois: Hehehehe...
    Peter: You filthy, stinky prostitute.
    Lois: Aha, ok I get it...
    Peter: You foul, venereal disease carrying, street walking whore.
    Lois: Alright, that's enough!


    * AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
    I remember that episode, too funny.

    Bruce, check out that Gepetto skit if you haven't already, muaha.

  15. #15
    Senior Member Chemical's Avatar
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    yeah, i saw the episode. It's hilarious!

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