Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to me. About 30 minutes later I get out of bed and find him in the computer room play World of Warcraft. His friends needed him. FML
This is a discussion on fuck my life within the Off Topic forums, part of the Entertainment category; Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to ...
Page: 2
LinkBack URL
About LinkBacks
Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to me. About 30 minutes later I get out of bed and find him in the computer room play World of Warcraft. His friends needed him. FML
nah i had seen it ages ages ages ago, but i just recently started reading it again. and i though i would posttt itttt for view enjoyment.You just found this website? It's quite old, it's one of those I check on daily, along with Explosm, LICD and CAD.[/b]
is funny!
Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML
LOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLToday, I was going to have sex with my hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was "pollo frito". I then proceeded to have sex, constantly screaming pollo frito for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FM[/b]
''Today, I sent my boyfriend some nude pics of me. Later I get a text from my dad asking me when I had gotten a tatoo. FML,,
Today, I was walking in the park when I saw an attractive girl walking nearby. I approached her to strike up a conversation when suddenly a large fly invaded my left nostril, and became lodged inside. After picking out the bloody fly pieces, I looked up to see the girl walking away, gagging. FML
LOOOOL
Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML
Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML
ROFL!!
Today, I pissed my younger brother off. Seemingly unrelated to this was the fact that I left my laptop on in my room along with MSN signed into my email adress. Now, all my contacts know that I apparently "just love the warm feeling of semen sliding down my throat". FML
Today, I came home from working twelve hours straight. Feeling rather frisky, I attempted to seduce my wife upon arriving home. She said that sleep was better than sex and proceeded to go directly to bed. It was only 6:30 PM. FML
heres my own FML. yes, it happend to me, i posted the short version on the site. heres the full version..
Today, under the stress of having to take 8 AP tests, I felt the compulsive urge to break something. My brother and I went outside and found many boxes surrounding my neighbors trash can. the boxes were filled with glass and wooden objects. A dish network dish lay near by. We proceeded to break everything in each box with the dish. My brother found a printer. after ninjalooting the ink carterages, we decided to bust that up too. I felt the urge to jump on it, so i did. the printer shot out from underneath me and I ended up breaking a bone in my wrist and now have to wear a full arm cast for 2months, meaning im gonna be the crippled guy at prom, graduation, and all the parties afterwards. Also, it turned out that my neighbors werent throwing anything away. They were moving and placed some valuables in boxes. FML!
just a moment ago i went to shower while i was washing my head 2 chicks who took shower in same time as me took my clothes and towel and runned away xD - FML
im glad that nobody saw me running naked trough corridor (it is late 3 A.M here) my roommates have some good laughs >_<
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
this one i found on web epic!
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "because you can't find a real girl I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
http://www.fmylife.com/love/761206 :lol: :lol: :lol:
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks